i was considering calling this post ‘do you remember the first time?’ but that would be so unutterably wank i’d have to kill myself, which is why i went for this unutterably smug load of old toss instead. dodged that bullet!

I actually don’t remember that much about my first gig. It was the Longpigs at the Royal Court Theatre, in Liverpool. Travis and Embrace supported, neither of whom we’d heard of at the time. I thought it was a school night, because I remember explaining to my Mum that gigs finished at 11, but according to the Internet it was the 8th February 1997, and that was a Saturday, although I’m not convinced by this review because I was yelling for Jesus Christ all night and I’m sure they played it near the end. If they did play it first I must have looked like a colossal wanker. Embrace were in the NME On section, like, that week. That was when they were the next Oasis. Everybody loved Embrace — the Fireworks EP was later NME’s single of the week, long before they became a ladrock laughingstock — but I preferred Travis’ rockier stylings, and also partly wanted just to disagree with people. There’s that contrary streak. God knows what went wrong with Travis — well, actually they found a formula and stuck with it. The first album still stands up: U16 Girls, All I Want To Do is Rock, and the superbly-appropriately-titled Tied To The 90s.

It’s a bitter irony that Travis came up with the money-spinning indie ballad formula and then had to pack it in, only for Coldplay and Keane and that ilk to steal their thunder. To be fair, Coldplay give better indie ballad than the turgid shite Travis used to peddle. And then there’s all those perfectly decent indie bands who are great when they’re going fast but only have hits with ballads and so keep churning them out, like Snow Patrol.

Um, what was I talking about?

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